MTV 2001 Movie Awards...Tripwire Style





Last night MTV handed out golden popcorn at the 2001 Movie Awards. Each year the channel mixes up the categories into something more fun and exciting than the norm. The Tripwire did our homework and watched said awards presentation, and came up with our own categories and awards, taken from what we saw on last nightís show. It took the jury a long time to award these prestigious gems to the proper people, and feel that we nailed it. And the award goes toÖ


Duo We Want More Of: Jimmy Fallon and Kirsten Dunst held the evening down and worked surprisingly well together on camera. The opening pre-tape of The Mummy spoof was hilarious, along with Fallonís various imitations of Chris Rock, Jerry Seinfeld, and Adam Sandler.

Worst Plug: John Travolta, Halle Barry, and Other dude. Other than Travoltaís tasteless rug, this plug was the worst display of "we have to do this because we know that we just spent $70 million dollars on a shitty movie" bit that ever existed. Travolta and Other guy showing their stomach after grinding with the alcoholic Barry? And who was the other dude? The guy from the X-Men? His agent must have blown half of Hollywood to get that unknown on that stage. WhateV.

Hottest female: Zhang Ziyi from Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon looked amazing, even though her bit with David Spade well by the wayside due to a few butterflies and translation problem.

Drop Dead Hilarious: Will Ferrellís walk on as "Award Acceptance Speech Coach" when Ben Stiller won the Best Comedic Performance award. Most of the bit was improvised with keeper lines like "Iíll knock your teeth out right now like chiclets", and the capper of Ferrell actually urinating his grey sweatpants. Then as the two left the stage Stiller sent a body shot to Ferrell knocking the best part of SNL back on to the stage, before chasing Stiller backstage making for the cherry on top of the best bit of the evening.

Most Out Of Place: Tom Cruise looked like a straight Hollywood actor applying for membership in the church of Scientology. Cruise accepted the award for most pompous cock that finally divorced his heterosexual wife, we mean best male performance. The applause and cheers went about 4 minutes too long as Cruise just held up the award then said "thanks"ÖapplauseÖ"thanks" then Cruise left the stage and made our applause pay off.

Best Bit: Adam Sandler asking Jimmy Fallon to do an impression of him then crying like a baby after seeing how Fallon portrayed him. Sandler and Fallon are friends so we knew this had to be going somewhere other than the "I hate you" thing. Britney Spears then came into the room to console Sandler (both were live via satellite) and later made fun of the co-host Dunst. It looked like it could have been as good as Wrestle Mania when Spears finally hugged Sandler and Adam gave the audience a little wink and thumbs up, expressing his enthuiasm for getting his hands on some of that grade A silicone.

Shameless Pre-Show Anti-Star: Chris Connelly used to host the movie documentaries and now thinks that he is Dan Rather or Wolf Blitzer on location in Kuwait or something the way he is milking his air time. During the pre-show Connelly interviewed then hugged (attacked) Tom Cruise and Jim Carrey, before passing it off to Chris Connelly for a pre-taped interview with Mark Wahlberg and Chris Connelly. Chris, Carson Daly is the star of the channel and you arenít as good as you think you are. Actually you are kind of annoying, and Beyonce Knowles and Mark Hoppus did a fantastic job interviewing the stars as they walked in the theater, before you snatched the camera back to milk more of Chris Connelly's airtime.

Most Realistic Award: Sophia Coppola was awarded the Best New Filmmaker prize by George Lucas (who also looked out of place). Coppolaís premier film The Virgin Suicides was one of the best things recorded on film in 2000, and it was wonderful that she was recognized for her achievement. Although she did not thank her husband and fellow film maker Spike Jonze, we saw glimpses of him behind the shots of TOM CRUISE? who they kept cutting to while Coppola accepted her award. Coppola has lots of tasty treats for our eyes in the future, and try to check the Jonze directed short starring Coppola on the Beastie Boys DVD.

Most Likely To Get Work Because Of Their Wins:
Sean Patrick Thomas from Save the Last Dance and Erika Christensen
From Traffic are fairly new to the acting game, and both blasted through their respected performances. Christensen strikes a canny resemblance to Thomasí co-star Julia Stiles who strikes a resemblance to singer Mandy Moore ñ all of which were shown in some aspect during the ceremony.

Was She ON Crack, Or Is She Just Cracked?: Cameron Diaz won and accepted two awards for her work in Charlie's Angels, and continued to act like a seventh grader on her first date. She mentioned that she was sweating (but not smelly) and continued to wipe her armpits with her dress. During her second acceptance a fan in the crowd shouted something and Diaz giggled and replied, "How much?" It was mentioned that she will star in the upcoming Vanilla Sky directed by Cameron Crowe which is sure to be a gigantic blockbuster. Editor's Note: Drew Barrymore was nowhere to be found.

Was That A Real Movie?: Piper Perabo won the award for Best Music Moment for singing "One Way Or Another" in Coyote Ugly. We checked with our research department and it seems that Coyote Ugly was an actual movie that was filmed and released in real movie theaters. When we saw the trailers we thought it was an advertisement for women.

Best Commercial For New Movie: Pootie Tang looks to be the Iím Gunna Git You Sucka for 2001. Written and directed by former Late Night with Conan OíBrien and Chris Rock Show head writer Louis C.K., Tang plays a crime fighter fighting a corporation and boss who sells cigarettes and beer to kids. The boss is rumored to be played by Andy Richter. Please let it be known that we here at the Tripwire always "sign our pitty on the runny kind".

This yearís show was ten times better than the inseparable and un-stomachable Wayanís brothers fiasco of 2000. All in all it wasnít that bad at all, and if you missed it - it will be on 1,000,000 more times this weekend!!!

Source: Jason Anfinsen

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MTV 2001 Movie Awards...Tripwire Style