On November 3, Jack Black and Kyle Gass, AKA JB and KG, alias The D, the
greatest band in the world, Tenacious D, held a press conference to announce
their latest attempt to prove to the world their resolve and dedication to
the craft of rock & roll.
From the halls of the Millenium Hotel, with press buzzing and cameras
flashing, the gods of all things rock proclaimed that for the next 45 days,
they would both be confined in a glass chamber above New York City's Times
Square, deprived of food, with only rock as their sustenance. The duo
claimed, in fact, that they would better David Blaine by one day and would not be released from their glass prison for
45 days or until their latest DVD, The Complete Masterworks (released this
Tuesday), reached platinum sales. Dressed as the superheroes they are, JB and
KG looked resigned, as well as regal, as they laughed off comparisons to other
wannabe stunts of the same ilk and KG stated that he in fact "took umbrage
at the thought" and to claims that their serious undertaking was in anyway a
simple ploy to sell more DVDs.
The D then exited with no fear and prepared for their 5 PM walk into
Unfortunately, JB and KG did not last. By 5:30 PM, the last true rockers to
walk the earth had abandoned their quest. Driven off in an ambulance, then
pushed into MTV's "TRL" studio in wheelchairs and suffering from
malnutrition, Black and Gass admitted defeat. But all is not lost, even with
a dent in their mettle, the champions of the rock have given us a brand new
DVD, promise of a feature length film and more. Stay tuned for more heroics
from the hardest rocking men in show business.
Source: Miguel Banuelos, firstname.lastname@example.org