The Hair The TV The Baby And The Band


When Faith No More became no more in 1998, well after that famous fish stopped flapping, FNM keyboardist Roddy Bottum had as much use for the San Francisco freak-rock-metal-funk-experiment as a box of Rice-A-Roni. Bottum's role in the band became less significant as time wore on, and even though he drudged through various shit storms and stuck like a champ until the band's ultimate demise, faith in his old bay area mates was anything but devout.


During the mid-90s, along with drummer of The Dicks Lynn Truell, Bottum formed the breezy cheery feel good about your face pop outfit Imperial Teen, whose debut album Seasick was produced by Redd Kross crazypants Steve McDonald, and became the 4th best album of 1996 according to Spin Magazine at a time when people actually read Spin Magazine.

In 1999, their gleeful rush of charm landed on the Jawbreaker movie soundtrack which then lead to opening slots for such weirdo acts as Hole and Marilyn Manson. After Universal Records bit a significant chunk out of the necks of everyone in the early 2000s, Imperial Teen eventually found sanctuary on Merge, who in 2002 would release the band's third animated hurrah, On.

Powered by a landslide of disarming jubilance, The Hair The TV The Baby And The Band, slated for an August 21st release on Merge, is a praiseworthy assortment of candies, lollipops, and everlasting gobstoppers full of sweet sweet pop that would make any dentist cringe in horror.

"Shim Sham" is one of the sexiest numbers on this collection of twelve, shining with a fervid luster like Veruca Salt, Velocity Girl or That Dog might have done in the mid-90s when their names meant something, to anyone. "One Two" and "Sweet Potato" are gut punch workouts that should be blasted into school cafeterias across the country, providing our lil fatso leaders of tomorrow with some much needed exercise. "Room With A View," the album's longest prick which pokes for close to four-minutes, is an ingratiating hum of pleasure that reflects the graceful experience of this zestful outfit. The tepid closer "Do What You Do" is similar to a smooth Belle And Sebastian stroke of breathtaking mastery.

The fulgent feel one gets when fingering The Hair The TV The Baby And The Band is quite exhilarating, like a quick brush against an attractive stranger in a crowded stairwell. As your body gently scrapes against theirs, you feel something that immediately ignites the junk in your dormant trunk and before you can turn around to track down your new found love, its gone and lost forever.

Although Bottum is openly gay and his band, from San Francisco of all places, have been labeled a queer-pop quartet by those who find labels necessary, Imperial Teen have created a universally delightful piece of audio here that will easily cross over the cross gender lines of altered sexuality for the satisfaction of every ass on god's good planet. The debonair vocals and picturesque melodies are quite addictive, soft and gentle like a cool midnight kiss or as flesh melting as the stringent summer sun.

"Shim Sham"





"Do It Better"





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The Hair The TV The Baby And The Band