Tiny Masters Of Today will be no such thing tomorrow. A mandatory growth spurt will ultimately kick in, quickly morphing these pre-tween siblings into the "Normal Sized Teenagers Of The Future". Arctic vocals come courtesy of young Ada (11) while big brother Ivan (13) keeps time and strums the bass. Both kiddos play guitar and rep Brooklyn as their home. These enthusiastic adolescents ain't Hanson or Smoosh or even the bloody Partridge Family. Their debut album Bang Bang Boom Cake is an exceptionally stirred pile of racket similar to low-grade Bikini Kill, The White Stripes, Blues Explosion or any fuzzbomb riot act with a phony ID.
Tiny Masters Of Today are delightfully raucous and brimming with potential, although it would be quite exhausting to live in a home with these rambunctious prodigies. Can't you picture the two of them banging their soon to be arthritis ravaged fists on your walls and refrigerator and face with hours of unflinching youth?
This batch of unbridled chaos reminds me of Ben Kweller's early recordings with Radish or Ben Lee's first smash of Australian madness in Noise Addict. "Sticking It To The Man" & "Hollogram World" both fit like an electric-purple Le Tigre dress while "Trendsetter" resurrects a fast-rapping vibe in vein of Texas loonies Butthole Surfers on their only hit from Electric Larryland, "Pepper."
Try if you might to remember just what kind of fart blasting antics your little butt was squeezing out at the ripe age of discarded juvenile and let the reality of this perplexing team sink in. Young people who possibly still cannot comprehend the intricacy of human reproduction developed this baker's dozen of abrasive excellence.
Now that I think about it, is it criminal to bang your partner in their glory hole all sweaty night long while listening to a couple of noisy tykes? I'll take my chances with John Law and blast the volume on Bang Bang Boom Cake any day of the week, only after I've thrown my homework onto the fire and killed a bottle of Old Grand Dad found in Mom's "hidden" closet of liquor.
"Hey, Mr. DJ"