Timewaste - Rage Fan Vs. Hipster Record Store Clerk

This gem of a Craigslist post was sent to us from a friend of The Tripwire, and it has had us in stitches. Sure, we've all felt a bit put off by the stereotypical music snob indie music store clerk, but we've never felt the burning desire to post our anger online. Behold, the wrath of a music consumer scorned by a music shop employee over a Rage Against The Machine album purchase. Here is the post in all of its glory:

Dear Hipster Record Store Clerk,

Thank you for judging me on the CD I bought yesterday. Our passive-aggressive altercation made me realize how conformist I am for buying an old Rage Against The Machine album. Your condescension was just the intellectual wake-up call I needed.

I discovered a new me yesterday, and my eyes were opened in a new way. Thanks to you, I realize now that the key to enlightenment is reading Pitchfork, watching High Fidelity, listening to Velvet Underground, having a tattoo of a star on the inside of my wrist, growing an ironic mustache, living in the Mission, and wearing a too-small sweater, multi-colored 70's ski-vest, chunky plastic-frame glasses, a high school sports T-shirt, air-tight black jeans, and Nixon-era Chuck Taylors.

I had it all wrong, man. You showed me that a skilled job and a comfortable living is just a lie. I need to go to art school, have my parents pay my rent, join a Joy Division-influenced band, and wait for a record deal, like you. I'm totally missing out in life.

So thanks again for mocking me. I mean, at first I thought you were just a pathetic, frustrated musician trying to feel better about yourself. But now I see you're an uncompromising visionary.

No one will ever understand you. You're so different.


Everyone Not Like You

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Timewaste - Rage Fan Vs. Hipster Record Store Clerk