Remember back in the days? (c) Biggie Smalls...
Honestly, I had no idea how to play the PG-13 role with the above title. Thoughts slurred through my domepiece amongst the likes of "A** Like That" (Eminem), "Shake Ya A**" (Mystikal) and/or good ol' "Donk(s)!" (Soulja Boy Tell Em)...well, why oh why would I be talking about backsides? Three words.
The aim of this post? Funk a supergroup like Fabolous meets Ryan Leslie meets Ne-Yo, the gang needs to pony up and give the fans a one-two punch, throwback "Knock Out Kings" style with the two biggest names in R&B right now. Ciara ain't selling? Funk her. Lloyd no longer on Murder Inc.? Funk him. Cherish who? Funk 'em!
As advertisers continue to make it rain on rapper endorsement deals and try to toss shame at soon-to-be "has-beens" like Chris Brown, it brings the kid an uncontrollable urge to make a plea for the record labels to put their minds together and see my vision (via Suite903.com...owww....)
One, if not "the" biggest selling albums of 2008? Beyonce's I Am...Sasha Fierce. Go back a year, 2007? Alicia Keys' As I Am murks Larry Johnny and his grandmama's hopes of seeing some teen sensation take over the R&B game. Point at hand? GET THOSE TWO A JOINT ALBUM TOGETHER!
We've already seen their chemistry with Jay-Z. Beyonce is wifed up with Hovi while Alicia Keys and Jay take over the entire radio game with their "Empire State of Mind" track, right? Shucks, even Beyonce had that "Deja Vu" record with the Greatest Rapper Alive, right? To make things even more interesting, think about it. Both of 'em on an entire LP together? You're guaranteed at least two guest features by Mr. Carter along with (take a wild guess) crazy production from a little guy called "Swwwizzzzy, man" (Swizz Beatz)...and with all the trials and tribulations they've gone through since their last albums dropped (Solange going Erykah Badu with the head, Kanye West VMA incident, Mashonda airing out ol' girl)....the buzz around the project would be ridiculous...
Look, the sad truth is R&B is not what it used to be. Rihanna made a crazy comeback after the whole Chris Breezy incident and look, she comes in at number four with around 180,000 copies in its first week when Susan Boyle murders the top 20....no, the ENTIRE 2009 releases by pushing 700,000 her first week in the United States. So, if I may ever so kindly turn into a throwback George W. Bush right about now...
"Americans, R&B is at war right now. This is a state of emergency and the time to act is NOW. We have waited and seen our fellow R&B singers fall victim to label drops (Omarion), career-damaging rumors (Pleasure P) and just downright leaked XXX photos (Cassie). We will no longer tolerate this. May God bless us all."
Alicia. Beyonce. America needs you two right now. If not for me, then at least for our country. No "Best of Both Worlds" or even an "Aliconce Kewles." Just something along the likes of a 12-track compilation, even if you simply named it, "Best Of Us" or something you could use a Sharpie and write it on a CD-R demo disc. The time to act is now, please. R&B heads, let's make this happen!
Holla if you hear me. -@CyrusKLanghorne