Don't get mad at us if you've already read about Emerica's collaborative shoe with Bishop Don Magic Juan on some sneaker blog. It's just that when we see something so horrifically, gruesomely beautiful live and in the faux-gator/bovine/vinyl/spraypaint flesh, we kinda have to purge it from our brains before it infects the Classy Oblongata. The only thing missing from this shoe is a mechanical hand that springs from the tongue to slap the taste out of other people's sneakers.