Rain sucks. “Singin’ In The Rain” dude, you're wrong and you’re ruining your fedora. There is a lot of rain in London. There are also a lot of winding, narrow streets that lead into other winding, narrow streets. We fell victim to both of these factors while searching out Fabric last Thursday to catch Adventures In The Beetroot Field. We missed Neon Neon, but downstairs in Room 1, after making our way inside, stumbled upon a stage filled with Martians—caped, hooded, glammed-out Martians. Roughly ten of them were onstage blasting out proggy funk tunes that combined pieces of Parliament, Battles, and early Fatboy Slim. There was a horn section, the bass was dirty and loud, the drummer had roto-toms, and there were four backup singers that smiled crazily and jumped into the crowd. No one seemed to know who they were, but the kids were loving it. Turns out they’re London-based Chrome Hoof, and their album Pre-Emptive False Rapture came out last year on Southern. They played until the stagehands came out and said “No more, you’re done,” around 2:45AM, but by then it was so packed and sweaty and filled with dudes that it was time to head into Room 2 anyway, where Kieran Hebden—bka Four Tet—kept us dancing (on stage!) with his trademark euphoric blip-no jams until the rain had gone and the streets made more sense.