Mariah Carey might be the only singer on earth who can namecheck Fritos in a breakup song and make it work. "Boy you actin' so corny like Fritos," she sings in her new album's title track "Infinity," about her divorce from Nick Cannon. But she's less talented when it comes to actually cooking with them—if you can call what she does with Fritos "cooking." In her first-ever cooking show, for Funny or Die, Mimi whips up a foul Frito pie. What starts out normal enough ends with the pop icon adding M&Ms and Sangria to the mix. That's okay though because she keeps us entertained throughout the messy process with her ample hair flips and stories like "So I had an Italian lover named Frito... Frito stole my car. So he was kind of a jerk but you always want to gravitate towards those guys." Next time, Mariah should get her own talk show.